I will never forget the expression on the cardiologist's face upon seeing the result of my stress test... "ABNORMAL"... pero ang bata mo pa... he looked genuinely worried.
To be honest, I kind of expected it already... with all the signs that I'm having. I already knew that I was on my way there. With the lifestyle, the eating habits, activities. Plus stress... yes, I expected it.
Mga kasabayan ko, 85+ years of age ....they were with either their kids or apo na yata. They must have enjoyed their lives already.
There I was a 38-year old, not even half their ages. I feared na baka mauna pa ako sa kanila. I feared getting old sa totoo lang, ayoko umabot sa point na kailangan na ako asikasuhin ng iba for the basic things and to take care of me.. pero wag naman sana agad. Wag muna agad.
I'm begging God to allow me to stay longer...
My daughter needs me.
Ang unfair naman sa kanya if pati mommy mawawala sa kanya.
Napakarami na nyang struggles sa buhay.
I just hope. In the remaining years that I got to spend with her. May it be filled with hope for brighter future, love, joy, peace and happiness and success.
May the Lord have pity sa aming magina. Kasi sa totoo lang. Nakakapagod na din talaga.
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